Dr. Cox's Winter Stash

Looking back on my life, I've noticed that people don't praise me as much as they used to.

Nobody claps when I successfully crap in a toilet, flush and wash my hands.

Nobody gives me a gold star for remembering to put my chair on top of my desk so the janitor can mop under it.

Nobody remarks positively on my vocal participation in high school sexual education classes. It's even frowned upon nowadays.

So far, this trend has held steady into clerkship. I rarely find myself getting praised for anything. This isn't because I haven't been able to adequately demonstrate a clerk appropriate mastery of the history, physical and treatment, rather I haven't been praised in spite of it. Shouldn't someone who's inept at even the most pedestrian maneuvers and evaluations be congratulated whenever they leave an interview without being served a subpoena?

The bright side to receiving scant words of encouragement is that when something does go right, it becomes the highlight of your week. Like last week, I found a 1/6 murmur and showed my preceptor how to do a McMurray test. He said "You're quite good with your physical findings." Like a woman with a broken bikini buckle, I clutched those words to my chest and didn't let go for the rest of the week.

And then today, after hitting my first 3 venipunctures, he said "You've turned pro pretty fast!". Again, clutching, savouring etc, etc.

So far, this strategy's served me well. The sheer number of dumbasseries I make everyday are enough to cause anybody to quit, especially medical students who positively thrive on achieving. If I focus on the few things I do correctly though, maybe it'll keep me going long enough for me to learn how to do everything properly.

PS - Needlestick history is negative for infectious disease. Clutching, savouring...